Artist Statement

When I started painting this my heart was so motivated to recreate a past painting I did. My heart was in it but I was getting so sick I lost the energy and said tomorrow I’ll finish tomorrow. And then I ended up in the hospital where my physical pain was finally treated as physical and not just in my head. In the hospital I wasn’t allowed to eat/drink/couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t sip water without getting sick. The morphine took away the physical pain from the blockage they found in my intestines, but because I was so dehydrated/ lacking nutrients/couldn’t take oral medication everything was put in me by IV and it overwhelmed my body till it hurt more than the pain I came in for and I became delirious, but even through that pain I knew I would finally be okay and once I was diagnosed with crohns and out of the hospital it gets better everyday. Today I looked at this painting and decided it was finished because it was my darkest I nearly died, and that story is over, now I’m in light.

Artist Biography

For 21 years I didn’t know who I was or why I couldn’t figure out life. I was miss diagnosed with many mental illnesses and disabilities. I had a strong heart but my body was starving and dying and no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t get better and I didn’t know what was happening to me wasn’t normal. I ended up in the hospital where they found an intestinal blockage, there I found out I had Crohns and everything in my life started to make sense. Up until now I never really understood my own art, but now I look back at all of it and realize my gut always knew what was wrong and my art was my guts voice. Art is in everything now and everything is beautiful, I found light and I found art when I felt like I was dying. More of my story is available on my Instagram @makaylagoldsmith

Find Makayla online: 

Instagram: @that.artist.under.a.chair Facebook: @makaylagoldsmith